Alright so here goes nothing… the topic that most people try to avoid or talk the least about … passing on.
Yes I know it’s a depressing topic and I had never really been touched by it until about a month ago, when I attended my first 2 funerals. One for a young lady that was a friend back in elementary school and then 3 weeks later for my very own father, who passed away at the age of 53.
I decided after funeral #1 that I didn’t want to go to another one for a very long time, it’s definitely a difficult experience even if you try to look at it as the celebration of someone’s life. Common emotions when you grieve usually include sadness, regret, anger and happiness (I’ll explain the happiness part in a second).
Sadness that you’ll never see your loved one in the flesh again is the most common, it’s tough not to cry like a baby when God reminds you that your time is limited and that all things come to an end. It’s ok to cry and you definitely should, it shows that you care.
Anger and regret are also very common feelings because we all struggle to understand why people get taken away from this earth, espescially if their passing is sudden. Then of course there is also the regret that comes from not spending enough time together or arguments that hurt one another or never really got settled to the point where you could barry the hatchet and be at peace with things.
The truth is no matter which emotion you feel, they are all acceptable forms of behaviour in grieving. But what I heard ironically just before going through these difficult times is that statistically speaking after three months, the affects of losing someone fade enough to the point where your day to day happiness is no longer affect by someone’s death.
That’s not to say you’d never reflect back on things and feel sadness again, but it does mean that you will carry on with life….eventually.
JTG
